Some Late-ish Updates

Sorry for the silence.

I’m just busy with preparing the next season and I have things on my mind. I started on a short novella. I don’t know if I’m going to finish it or not. It is a quick sci-fi story that probably is a little too inspired by Murderbot. But it’s there to just feed my need for basically more competency porn.(I really dislike the term but, what else can I call my want of competent characters?

It’s yet again September 11th. Every year, I always stop and think of something to write about this day. And I really don’t have anything. It’s just kind of a subdued day for me. I wasn’t in New York. I was just a teenager in school who, by the time she got home, decided that instead of watching the non-stop coverage, I just watch PBS because that was all that was on that wasn’t the rubble of the World Trade Center.

I was in high school and spent the better part of the day watching everything. Heck, I saw the second plane hit on live TV. And that was my “Oh Crap” moment. So by that time the school day ended, I was exhausted. I wanted to see something else. Both PBS channels thankfully remained a safe haven for kids to go. So I watch Arthur and whatever else I was given. Maybe Clifford the Big Red Dog??? I mean, I was still a kid as a teenager. I didn’t pretend to be an adult. I never have. I was quite aware of my age then, and I sometimes felt like a mix of a young and old soul at the time. Some things I cared about, the nerdy things that I didn’t have anyone to talk to about.

Black girls couldn’t be nerds or watch PBS. In fact, PBS is why I love documentaries. Also, this foreshadowed the future of avoiding watching the news when I don’t have to watch it. Which is never now.

That night, since we lived in Charlotte-Douglas Airport landing and take off corridor so we could hear plenty of airplanes over head. Sometimes, I would watch them. That night, there were none. All planes were grounded. It was eerie hearing no planes.

I was in the creative writing club, and we did publish a little 9/11 tribute zine. Most of the members wrote something. I never did. Not for any of the publications. I was just a member because I loved writing, and it was fun because I was with other writers. All of them were very smart, given that one of them was the valedictorian of my class. I didn’t feel very smart, even though I was invited by the English teacher who was head of the club. She liked me because I was intuitive.

I still don’t feel very smart.

That feeling never goes away, even as an adult, and you have a learning disability and were made to feel stupid.

Anyway, if you want to watch a good documentary of just that day, One Day in America: 9/11. You can watch it on Disney+ and parts of it on Youtube if not the whole thing this time of year. They streamed it last year. I didn’t look for it this year.

And if I sound kinda morose. I am.

Nothing bad. All of it out of my control because I can’t control other people. But I’m still disheartened by it.

Anyway, thank you for reading. God bless.